Back in touch

Wow, I can’t believe how quickly time flies. It’s been so long since I posted anything. I promise I’ve been thinking about you, even if I haven’t been in touch.
So where did I leave off?
I was headed to the UK and Spain to meet my future inlaws. It was such a great trip. Uk was having their heat wave and I actually managed to get sunburnt, which was very entertaining for an Aussie like me. Even though I was travelling to the UK during their summer, I still packed jeans and cardigans. Normally our winter is similar temperatures to their summer.
Anyway, my new family is so lovely. I was embraced immediately and made so welcome, to their family and their homes. I now have two of the most adorable nephews ever, two sisters and parents who are so similar to mine it’s nearly scary.
There was only one down side. Virgo man’s jealous streak came out during his sisters wedding. While I can’t deny it was my freudian slip that triggered it, it still really shocked me. It made me wonder if we would even still be together if I hadn’t fallen pregnant so early.
Anyway, let me explain. There was a general discussion happening around the table about girls changing their surnames when they get married. There were quite a few women there who had either gotten married recently or were engaged, and joking about how soon none of them would be their old name. I turned to Virgo man and told him for the first time in my life, I was really looking forward to changing my name when we married. (With any other boyfriend I’ve had, I was not inclined to change my surname). Unfortunately, I said the wrong name. I said Aries chef’s name by accident.
He looked at me strangely. It took me a few moments to realise. Then the earth opened up and swallowed me whole. What a F@$#*ing idiot. He stopped speaking to me for the rest of the reception. I found him in our hotel room an hour later. I apologised for the hundredth time and he let rip. That he felt he couldn’t trust me. He was the only one giving up anything, sacrificing anything for this relationship and I clearly wasn’t serious about us.
Seriously? I know, it was a major slip up on my behalf. And I don’t even know where it came from. I truly hadn’t thought about Aries chef in weeks, unless it was in passing when Virgo man was doing something wonderful for me like rubbing my feet and I thought “How lucky am I to have found someone this sweet, Aries chef would never be doing this for me”.
He’s the only one sacrificing anything? Do you know what is happening to my body right now? Let alone my emotions, my brain, my career, my finances?
A truce was called. We moved on. But every now and then I wonder if a jealous person can ever get past that personality trait. Is it my responsibility to prove my reliability – over and over again? I believe it is his to resolve his issues from the past. I don’t believe that I am untrustworthy. I’ve never cheated on a boyfriend. I can be flirty. I’m incapable of lying or even fibbing, I have no poker face. He can get cranky if mail gets delivered to the house addressed to Aries chef. I tried to point out that he hadn’t changed all of his mailing addresses either, wasn’t that just a man thing not a deliberate attempt to stay in my life, but apparently that wasn’t the same.
Anyway. Enough complaining. 99% of the time life is going great.
More life updates later.

Surprise

So I confess, I find myself in a blogging conundrum today.

I started this blog several months after I became single, and thought I might have enough interesting stories to tell. I have many blogs posts already written, that I was going to drip feed into the blog, admittedly, some of them months after they happened.

And then I met a guy. And fell into a relationship.

I resisted with all my strength, but he was tenacious. Not that I was completely passive in this – I really like him. I just wasn’t sure I was ready. I knew in my heart the next long term relationship was IT – but I thought I had more single adventures to have!!!  Hence why the blog has slowed down considerably after only a couple of posts. He’s a Virgo, and I have never spent much time in the company of Virgos, especially male ones. All my previous significant relationships were with Fire signs – two Leos and and Aries. So we spent most of the first two months adapting to the completely opposing energies that we were bringing to this relationship.

And then…I found out last week I was pregnant.

I suspected it for a week before that. I’m not on the pill, so I track my cycle pretty closely. I was using condoms, before anyone asks. I went to him and cried. This relationship was so new still, not even three months old. This was the last thing we needed, when we were still trying to get to know each other.  I was going to keep it – I’m pro choice, but it didn’t feel right for me personally.

But he was wonderful. He cried too. Told me he loved me, had been wanting to say it for weeks. He’d known from the start I was the one. He was just waiting for me to realise it too. We went to the doctor the next day together and had it confirmed.

So…now our conversations revolve around our new plans. Moving in together, doctors appointments, finances, baby names…and still getting to know each other. This journey just keeps getting more interesting.

So the theme of the blog is changing slightly. I’ll probably still post some of the single stories – let’s see how two themes run together. After all, this is still all my post Saturn Return story…